It was three years ago that I witnessed the most beautiful, sacred baptism that I have ever witnessed. Yes, my own is so special to me, but this one was like nothing I'd ever seen before, and it shed so much light and insight onto my own baptism so many years earlier.
This baptism didn't take place in a church or on the banks of the river but in a hospital room at the end of a long empty hall. Inside that room, my sister and her husband sat in a hospital bed holding their sweet baby they lost just a few hours earlier. Surrounding that bed were grandparents, aunts, an uncle, and the ministers. This moment was so sacred and heavy, and I haven't really shared with many people until now. As they handed over their baby boy to their pastor to baptize him, the Lord's presence in that room was so palpable. The moment was raw and beautiful and sacred and gut-wrenching and heartbreaking all at once. They were doing what so many other parents do. It just looked really different. They were handing their son over the Lord. They were committing his spirit to Him. They were trusting in God's promise to bring redemption, rescue, and ultimately resurrection to His people.
As our world was falling apart that day in that hospital room, some things came together so clearly in my heart. The first being the validation that ALL life is important. I have never been more convinced than in that moment that all life has worth. All life is a beautiful gift. Was this ceremony necessary? Yes, oh so necessary! The planning that went into the baptism ceremony for this little baby and the time that people took to take part in it was confirmation to my heart that all life is sacred....whether it's for only a few moments or for 90 years. And however long we spend on this earth is only a teeny, tiny speck compared to eternity.
Another thing that happened is that all my theological questions and arguments melted away. Being a member of various denominations over the years that hold varying views on baptism had caused me to really wrestle with my thoughts on baptism. Sometimes I sided with infant baptism, a sign and seal of the covenant, that mirrored the Old Testament setting apart of God's people. Sometimes I sided with believers' baptism, in obedience to salvation and a call to follow Jesus. That day I saw that it wasn't so much an "either/or" issue for me anymore but a "yes/and". Both are true. Both have a heart to follow Jesus. And that's the important thing right? The act is only a ritual. A very important one, but still only an outward representation. An outward response of an inward reality. I've lived a lot of life since then, and I try not to focus so much on where I stand on things. I've decided it's better to just focus on love. Love God and love people. I've also decided it's a much better way to live.
Finally, a lot of things about my own baptism and my own salvation came to light that day. There is nothing that we can do to earn our salvation and no amount of our own striving or good works can get us to God. I never saw a clearer picture of that than with Charlie. He was absolutely and completely powerless to do anything to earn God's favor, and he wasn't capable of doing any good work to get to God. I've always believed this to be true. With my head at least. When I was standing there in that hospital room that day, that was when the rubber hit the road. That was when it was driven deeper into my breaking heart. Do I REALLY believe this to be true?! Do I really believe that God and God alone is responsible for my salvation? I saw that I was just as powerless to save myself. There was absolutely nothing in me that even helped a tiny bit in obtaining my salvation. It is only the love and mercy of God in Christ reaching down to rescue me that made that possible. Even my accepting of his sacrifice on my behalf is only possible because of His grace.
Baptism is a symbol of the life, death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus and of our being united to Him in that as His followers. Charlie's life on earth was brief and his death was heartbreaking. Now we await the resurrection! We know that it is certain and that is what we eagerly hope for, new life!!
Another thing that happened is that all my theological questions and arguments melted away. Being a member of various denominations over the years that hold varying views on baptism had caused me to really wrestle with my thoughts on baptism. Sometimes I sided with infant baptism, a sign and seal of the covenant, that mirrored the Old Testament setting apart of God's people. Sometimes I sided with believers' baptism, in obedience to salvation and a call to follow Jesus. That day I saw that it wasn't so much an "either/or" issue for me anymore but a "yes/and". Both are true. Both have a heart to follow Jesus. And that's the important thing right? The act is only a ritual. A very important one, but still only an outward representation. An outward response of an inward reality. I've lived a lot of life since then, and I try not to focus so much on where I stand on things. I've decided it's better to just focus on love. Love God and love people. I've also decided it's a much better way to live.
Finally, a lot of things about my own baptism and my own salvation came to light that day. There is nothing that we can do to earn our salvation and no amount of our own striving or good works can get us to God. I never saw a clearer picture of that than with Charlie. He was absolutely and completely powerless to do anything to earn God's favor, and he wasn't capable of doing any good work to get to God. I've always believed this to be true. With my head at least. When I was standing there in that hospital room that day, that was when the rubber hit the road. That was when it was driven deeper into my breaking heart. Do I REALLY believe this to be true?! Do I really believe that God and God alone is responsible for my salvation? I saw that I was just as powerless to save myself. There was absolutely nothing in me that even helped a tiny bit in obtaining my salvation. It is only the love and mercy of God in Christ reaching down to rescue me that made that possible. Even my accepting of his sacrifice on my behalf is only possible because of His grace.
Baptism is a symbol of the life, death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus and of our being united to Him in that as His followers. Charlie's life on earth was brief and his death was heartbreaking. Now we await the resurrection! We know that it is certain and that is what we eagerly hope for, new life!!
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| kisses for her big brother |
This is beautiful. Thank you for sharing your heart
ReplyDeleteThis is a powerful expression of faith during a spiritual journey of heartbreak, loss, growth, and love. God's promises are real. The resurrection is the foundation of our faith and our reason for celebration. Death isn't the end, but the beginning of eternal life. Thank you for sharing your story.
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